I had a very different idea of \u200b\u200bhow I "prepared" this Christmas. I thought that somehow the "first" birth of my daughter. Well, technically the second, but the first in which wanders around the house and includes the sense of novelty, decorations and co.
I thought I would spend the month of December preparing for Christmas jobs in the company of my daughter, and that we decorated the house playing.
"I have no time, I have to hurry!" I thought bustle.
I was somehow ruining the last few days.
Then, I gave up. I realized that it is too small to do chores that I dream of doing with her (no time, next year!) And that already do crib paper was a heroic. I gave up
wonder-woman syndrome, I succumbed to the fact that this year I had something important to prepare for me and my work. So much stress is (rightly) turned around an important moment of my working life, and it was right even give due importance. I was also lucky: the date of My "goal" was not too close to Christmas, so I remained a bit of time for "waiting".
Well, let's say that was a time that I decided to take: I was physically too tired to continue working to the bitter end, and psychologically I need a stop too much to devote to the things I love.
And so, outside of my habits, I decided to take a month to stop (I will regret, I do not regret it, I do not know: I was always looking to do it and I did).
I gave up things in the past I would never "let go", but I chased to the end. I listened to myself, my body, what's inside of me, and I gave up in all'affanno race.
Everything seems in order: the presents already bought, without the last minute, and all the time to enjoy what's around this week's eve.
The dinners and lunches made only if it is really worth (and often it's worth), and the courage to say "no" to what is too out of place, or that it comes from the heart.
are a few days at home with small jobs last things to accomplish, and I feel bad every time I think I feel better every time you pass a calendar day and I leave behind me. Definitely.
I'm at a crossroads in my life (not figuratively) and be "in between" is strange and new to me. In the midst of choices. In the midst of change. In the midst of the sacrifices, thinking that they can become gains.
do not know how I'll be after this holiday season, I do not know what I will miss overwork, do not know if it will come more, but for now they are in "slow-on".
I get tired as hell to be with Brioscina all day, but somehow I'm happy. I like being with her, I like spupazzarmela, and until a few months ago I would have paid for not doing so.
What has changed? I can not say, but it is strange: it is as if my mind begins to slow down more and more like a slow motion film, and I began to see things differently.
Everything seems fleeting, but for the first time, for this I think deserves to be savored in every nuance. Look, I know, I've seen and learned (in this last period ever more intensely) that our life is hanging by a thread , and this thing distresses me deeply on the one hand, on the other side! Fullness. I was a child I hear references to Christmas on the essential goodness, to change, but I've never heard them in like now.
I feel that there are very few things that matter so much in my life, and whose life is worth living, sacrifice, invest. I can not say with certainty whether the right things to bet on, but right now for me it is.
I do not want to have more than what I need really.
a cliché, but that requires a lot of personal work on the path of essentiality (rhymes but does not coincide with poverty).
I'm trying a new era, the beginning of a new way of looking at life: there are yet, but I would do it.
My heart was shaking for a long time when suddenly I realized that everything we take for granted, from the ground on which to rest your feet air we breathe, can vanish in an instant. Life, love and a smile.
This amazing sense of insecurity has opened my eyes and made me a happy person: happy with what little I have, that does not mean you are not rich. The past is already
gone, the future we can not know it, we have to fully live our present. And that's what I want to do: I stop, breathe, take measures to my life. I have an important task to accomplish, this child grow and bring in the best way in the world on his feet. I do not know what I am good at doing this, but I have to go all out. And so, paradoxically (but not), I have respect for myself, and teach her that the only way to live in dignity.
This is Christmas I'm waiting.
A year ago, in the "holy night", I wrote other words. Today I am a different woman, but I will not forget the way I did to get here.
A year ago pain and now I hope peace, and a new beginning.
I thought I would spend the month of December preparing for Christmas jobs in the company of my daughter, and that we decorated the house playing.
"I have no time, I have to hurry!" I thought bustle.
I was somehow ruining the last few days.
Then, I gave up. I realized that it is too small to do chores that I dream of doing with her (no time, next year!) And that already do crib paper was a heroic. I gave up
wonder-woman syndrome, I succumbed to the fact that this year I had something important to prepare for me and my work. So much stress is (rightly) turned around an important moment of my working life, and it was right even give due importance. I was also lucky: the date of My "goal" was not too close to Christmas, so I remained a bit of time for "waiting".
Well, let's say that was a time that I decided to take: I was physically too tired to continue working to the bitter end, and psychologically I need a stop too much to devote to the things I love.
And so, outside of my habits, I decided to take a month to stop (I will regret, I do not regret it, I do not know: I was always looking to do it and I did).
I gave up things in the past I would never "let go", but I chased to the end. I listened to myself, my body, what's inside of me, and I gave up in all'affanno race.
Everything seems in order: the presents already bought, without the last minute, and all the time to enjoy what's around this week's eve.
The dinners and lunches made only if it is really worth (and often it's worth), and the courage to say "no" to what is too out of place, or that it comes from the heart.
are a few days at home with small jobs last things to accomplish, and I feel bad every time I think I feel better every time you pass a calendar day and I leave behind me. Definitely.
I'm at a crossroads in my life (not figuratively) and be "in between" is strange and new to me. In the midst of choices. In the midst of change. In the midst of the sacrifices, thinking that they can become gains.
do not know how I'll be after this holiday season, I do not know what I will miss overwork, do not know if it will come more, but for now they are in "slow-on".
I get tired as hell to be with Brioscina all day, but somehow I'm happy. I like being with her, I like spupazzarmela, and until a few months ago I would have paid for not doing so.
What has changed? I can not say, but it is strange: it is as if my mind begins to slow down more and more like a slow motion film, and I began to see things differently.
Everything seems fleeting, but for the first time, for this I think deserves to be savored in every nuance. Look, I know, I've seen and learned (in this last period ever more intensely) that our life is hanging by a thread , and this thing distresses me deeply on the one hand, on the other side! Fullness. I was a child I hear references to Christmas on the essential goodness, to change, but I've never heard them in like now.
I feel that there are very few things that matter so much in my life, and whose life is worth living, sacrifice, invest. I can not say with certainty whether the right things to bet on, but right now for me it is.
I do not want to have more than what I need really.
a cliché, but that requires a lot of personal work on the path of essentiality (rhymes but does not coincide with poverty).
I'm trying a new era, the beginning of a new way of looking at life: there are yet, but I would do it.
My heart was shaking for a long time when suddenly I realized that everything we take for granted, from the ground on which to rest your feet air we breathe, can vanish in an instant. Life, love and a smile.
This amazing sense of insecurity has opened my eyes and made me a happy person: happy with what little I have, that does not mean you are not rich. The past is already
gone, the future we can not know it, we have to fully live our present. And that's what I want to do: I stop, breathe, take measures to my life. I have an important task to accomplish, this child grow and bring in the best way in the world on his feet. I do not know what I am good at doing this, but I have to go all out. And so, paradoxically (but not), I have respect for myself, and teach her that the only way to live in dignity.
This is Christmas I'm waiting.
A year ago, in the "holy night", I wrote other words. Today I am a different woman, but I will not forget the way I did to get here.
A year ago pain and now I hope peace, and a new beginning.
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